UNDER A COLD MOON He's at it again. Sawing glass, hanging grainy circles, disks the color of Chinese plum sauce. Last week it was wax from a glassblower's pipe formed into eeling balloons and spirals, coils of blue-green snake. He can't leave it alone. It's the foreign light, I think: sun on spirals he's hung from branches along the lane, light catching on the hundred droplets strung on threads in the bedroom, droplets that chime like forest rain, when we tumble into the bed. And naive delight: clay, wax, or mud squeezed and shaped, risk in the molten radiance. He finger-paints us with the red mud from the river, on birthdays, gives us Venetian cristallo filled with cake. I tell you, he's different. Would replace his teeth with obsidian, or Chinese eye-bead inlays; score the new panes with his fingernails. But I won't have him any other way. He tunes us to the shimmer of light, plays the family like the ceramic pipes he gathered in the yard, crystalline organ singing out in the dawn, all of its own accord. He named the babies: Lalique, Galle, Marinot. Made them glass-brick playgrounds, millefiori balls. Let them dissolve the waterglass into shining syrup. My throat turns viscous cullet, his face translucent vitreous china, when we come in the beaded dark, on our bed of clay, under the plink and ring of teardrops. __ SKIN A skunk is a powerful totem teaching how to give and expect respect. — Ted Andrews, Animal Speak My thirty year old daughter and I plant seedlings at the cabin. She laughs at the pantry full of tomato juice laid by in case the dog tangles with a skunk. I do not tell her the skunk is my new totem. Skunk, moving at her own speed, fearless, peaceful. * A few days of crankiness, some spots on her torso, no bigger than seeds in a new tomato. She was tender under her arms when we picked her up, cried out. We would remember telling her: that didn't hurt. * At nine I took a salt shaker to the garden, ate warm tomatoes ripe from the vine. My grandmother blanched them in her yellow kitchen, slid the skins off, served them sliced, swimming in vinegar. The day I ran to him with bee stings, Grandpa grabbed the dish, slapped vinegar soaked tomatoes onto my arms. Pungent red wheels, juice and seeds running down into my hands. * In the emergency room they separate us. Alone, she shivers without her skin. Which one of you burned this child? * Chemistry lab, third hour. Smell of skunk and rotten eggs. Mr. Schaeffer explained: the black stains on our fingertips wouldn't wash off. The nitrate would slough away over the next weeks. At home my mother rubbed my black-brown fingers with pumice stone, tried in vain to erase the singe around my nails. * Vietnamese Myth There's the story of a maid who finds a giant footprint, and inside it, a single tomato seed. She fits her tiny foot into the imprint, and later, bears a child that grows to be a towering warrior the savior of her people. * Her skin slides off in strips, nothing to hold it in place. The doctor says—Now we know. Staph, flooding her system. He never apologizes. He reminds us of an owl, swooping after rabbits, skunks, squirrels. Nurses wear gowns and masks to protect themselves. Wrap her in silver nitrate soaked bandages, neck to knees. When they move us to the Burn Center the cleaning crew fogs the room. * Beside my daughter's bed, half-dreaming, I bring the tomato seed to rub along her foot, new skin grows before our eyes. * You know the famous photo Vietnam—a thin girl burned by napalm my daughter standing naked on her bed—arms out like unfeathered wings * Her father's father grew tomatoes. Last son of hard-hand pioneers, most of his siblings gone. He tied up vines, burned fat tomato worms in a tin can. His first grandchild died in her crib. We never told him how close he came to losing the second. * Sometimes skunk shows up to teach us how to pay attention...Those with this totem may have a sensitivity to tomato...it is part of the contrary or balancing medicine The doctor stammers, doesn't like talking to both of us—wants to whisper the facts to my husband in the hall, let him water it down and feed it to me in little sips he thinks I can swallow. Down the hall at the blood donor clinic volunteers dispense small cups of tomato juice. ____ on "Skin": My daughter was only four when a massive staph infection threatened her life. It has taken decades to find the manner in which I could write about it. That is, in a way I was comfortable sharing. on "Under a Cold Moon": A postcard picture of glass pieces, a recent Chihuly show I'd attended months before...that's what got me started. Then I discovered all the literature on glass making that was out there—history, science, art. The task became one of trying not to attach everything I'd found out to one little poem! |