She says my fingertips taste faintly of blood, taking another into her mouth: Have you been chewing again? A thin strand of streetlight sneaks in through the bedroom window, dimly illuminates the crosshatch of scars barely visible on the soft skin of her forearms. Small, straight nicks with a razorblade. Quarter-moon curves from fingernails. She rubs her thumb over my chewed fingertips, testing the ragged cuticles, the underside of nail where the pink, exposed dermis is sensitive to heat and touch: steam off a pot of boiling water, a particular agony. She wants to know if my skin tastes good to me. Would I like it if she bit me, too? She closes her fingers around my fingers, resists asking me once again if I would ever stop. I consider holding a blade to her skin, trading what I hate about her for what she hates about me; the little erosions that hold us together. ____ The girl is long gone, but the biting remains. |