1.
The old arguments at least were honest. Now, even the inventors
of dictatorship—their taste in industrial scenery and tranquility
so dead—are plagued with uncertainty. My assignment is to
peel back the edges and clip the illustrations (I cut the tiniest
rectangular peepholes). Whether or not Our War has begun, the new
man in authority mows the grass in our big backyard. His kids so
enjoy a spectacle that they ride in off the water in their little
motorboats to burn down happy family life into a magnificent pile
of silver ash.
2.
I have been engaged to take Our Heroine onto the flatbed of culture,
a little slavery in the background to fill the coffers. Mother
herself warns me not to bother closing my eyes or walking across
the desert. We meet at the tourist counter. So there are houses
and perhaps agriculture or flowers, flashing lights on a combo
dream we mistake for the Suicidal Spy. At question is the lifejacket
I’m wearing or she’s about to wear or Mother wore
in the past. Once Our War has begun, we rideshare through the
rush. In a less frenzied mood, we are in fact excessive in
everything.
3.
Let’s spread the map out in the middle of the game and notice
the silhouettes—we’re as good as dead anyway. Sales
are brisk. The women at the top bring down the snow. At their confectioner’s
shop, they instruct us in personal experience—pop, pop, pop—everything
we need: milk, eggs, sugar, and chocolate—in bulk and at
frequent intervals. We think intoxication divine, eating it raw
then and there. The water (we carry it home on a stretcher) tastes
like our sensitive skin.
4.
In the wilds of reconstruction, I describe the rescue to her in
detail. Furious at the workplace, we steal the missing back,
portaging their arms on the tops of our heads. We were miscued—how
she materialized in another country in a waiting room or a couple
kissing in a doorway. Virtual gangsters stumble by with high-pitched
gestures and rampage music. One recites a eulogy harmful to wildlife—a
spectacular house before we allowed it to run down. I used to
smell like orange-blossom lotion. Now, I’m the last person
on the list and the only one who didn’t reserve in advance.
I keep walking until the splashes of red come to an end.
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