Bohemian Rhapsody

As if in my own benediction ceremony, I would lay out all of the Queen albums, flush next to each other, in order of release, on my bedroom floor. The 45s from each album would lay on top of them, in the lower right-hand corner, also in order of release, from bottom to top.

I would then stand in front of this, drinking a wine cooler, as if I were Noah in the ten commandments movie[1], congratulating myself, clasping my arms behind my back, as if this was my ark, my own creation; that I had, as if through my sheer accumulation and arrangement of these objects, some part of creating them.

Actually, back then, I am sure that I thought I had created them, at least in the form of the configuration I was looking at, and the Bartles & Jaymes tasted sweet going down my throat, and with my room clean and vacuumed, I would lie on my bed, jerking off.[2]

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[1] The Ten Commandments (Cecil B. DeMille, 1956).
[2] London-Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody" topped a British poll of the greatest songs of the last 50 years. John Lennon's "Imagine" and the Beatles' "Hey Jude" took second and third places, respectively, with Simon and Garfunkel's "Bridge over Troubled Water" took fourth place, and George Harrison's "My Sweet Lord" in the fifth spot. (Source: BBC News.)